Ah, I just got out of a very hot bath and I’m totally relaxed.
I have random retardedness to talk about, so here it goes:
- The construction guy that I’ve had a crush on for months was checking me out. At least, that’s what I was told today. He was waiting for the train and my stomach clenched when I saw him. I got all kinds of nervous and ran to the next car. He gets off at the same stop as I do, so I summoned my balls and walked slow so that maybe I could smile at him. Yeah, I know. Smile. Very very forward. Anyhow, I was walking in front of him and was told that he was totally checking me out with a smile on his face. Maybe I’ll get the courage to talk to him sometime. But, I’m so out of practice that I have no idea what to say. How about “Hey, I’d love to be your blowjob queen” or “I need a good spanking” or “I give good anal”. I know, those are really archaic and prudish. Maybe I’ll start with a simple smile and a hello. I’ll wait until we’re dating for a while before I go all old-fashioned on him like that.
- I’m having a love affair with mushrooms that is epic and awe inspiring. I could make a different mushroom dish each day and be happy. Nay…I could eat the same mushroom dish every day and still be happy because it has mushrooms in it.
- The forest of Endor is currently residing on my legs and I’m not removing it until the weather gets warmer or I go on a fucking date.
- I love the new show New Amsterdam. That’s all.
- I’ve lost 32 lbs since the beginning of January. I’m working out 5 days a week and plan on running my first mini-marathon in a few months. Bellydancing is still a lot of fun and I’m practicing yoga.
- The last Harry Potter movie will be split in two and I’m happier than a grown woman should be.
- I need some ideas for books to read. Bring the recommendations on.
- Is it bad that I was so engrossed in a romance novel I picked up at the laundry mat the other night that I couldn’t put it down to go to bed? Yeah, I thought so. Pathetic.
- There is a huge billboard on the side of one of the roads near my house that features a woman on the toilet making a horrible face and the words “IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME?” If there wasn’t so much traffic I would have stopped and took a picture. The best billboard ever.
- All of this religious text reading gives me a headache. I have so much to say that I’m having trouble making sense of my frantic notes and putting everything in some kind of comprehensible paragraph. All I have to say is that all roads from the garden are leading to more than just the Abrahamic religions. I’m talking about deep reading into all kinds of texts that were written before the Old Testament. I know that this isn’t a surprise to those of you who know something about history and human kind, but this study could seriously be a life’s journey. I’m so fucking fascinated, challenged, humbled, and horrified by what I’m reading in all of these texts…especially the famous ones like The Old Testament and Qu’ran. The politics and propaganda contained in these stories are amazing. If there is indeed one almighty god out there, he is embarrassed and ashamed of us for writing these stories in his name. The stories are so ridiculously human that I find it absolutely appalling that after several millennia of existence, people are still allowing themselves to be governed by a bunch of stories and duped by a bunch of people manipulating those stories to fit their own agendas. Unbelievable. What does Sophia say about this, I wonder? You know, the gods didn’t give us humans such big brains if they didn’t want us to use them and question things. And by things, I mean all things including religion and existence…not just how to turn lightening into managed electric.
- Wish me luck with the construction worker. I haven’t been this squirrelly around a man in years. No lie. I’m fucking skittish, shy, and backward around him. I want to bite his chin. Yeah, I’m weird.
Okay, I’m back to watching American Idol and listening to Paula Abdul provide a perfect example of what the opposite of eloquent speech is. It’s painful, isn’t it?
Kisses..
Yes paula is painful to listen too. I love New Amsterdam as well. I think he’s totally hot. Maybe it’s the whole immortal thing. I dunno. Just sexy. Although the whole coachmen era was not good for him on this weeks episode.
I”m sure my forest could beat yours as far as legs go. I have no umpf to do it lately. My excuse is a baby. Now you have had family dealings etc. but get off yer arse and talk to the construction guy! 😛 That squirrely thing is always awkward and wonderful at the same time. Good luck!!
great post, I will send you an email about joining goodbooks for suggestions. Readers united to share what they read.
good luck w/the construction worker!
32 lbs!! Yay Debbie! Being a fellow runner, I have to say that my favorite race distance is the 8k (4.95 miles or something like that).
Great post. Kudos on the weight loss–just yesterday I had a coronary episode from walking up three flights of stairs and I was thinking that I should probably exercise or something.
It’s interesting, but sometimes I will read a blog such as yours and feel such affection for the author, but then I think about how much she would probably despise me in real life. After all, I don’t eat right or exercise. I loathe mushrooms. I am not interested in religion, even as an intellectual topic. And I hated the one episode of “New Amsterdam” that I saw (though the chick from “Rome” is cute). On the other hand, I love getting bit on my chin (I had a cat who used to do that when I whistled) and G-d knows my love of anal sex has no bounds.
I left a comment last night but my computer must have just been evil to me since it didn’t post.
Anyway, Paula is so annoying to listen too. New Amsterdam is one of my new favs too. I think he’s extremely cute. Minus the whole coachman era on this weeks episode. Not a good look for him.
And I am sure that my forest will beat yours any day. My excuse is my 7 month old. 😛 Good luck with construction guy!! Let us know how it turns out.
Shave your legs, wear something HOT and ask the man OUT! That is all.
You are a dork sometimes, I think that’s why I like you so much. Birds of a feather, ya know!!! 😉
Good luck w/ the construction worker, & kudos on the loss of the 32#.
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Congrats and good luck with the guy!
Say hello to the construction worker. Maybe he’s shy.
Yes, we are supposed to use the brains we’ve been given.
And…
32 pounds??? You are my hero! Good luck with the marathon training.
#10 is great – that stuff fascinates me as well…
I think starting with the simple smile is nice. Far too many women today wanna be the “blowjob” queen too soon.. 🙂
I like mushrooms, but can’t get myself to do portobellos. People eat them between two halves of a bun and frankly I’d rather have a big juicy Maverick brand burger there!
Congrats on the weight loss!. It’s tough but we can do it if we work hard. Actually I lose when I’m happy and content, gain when I’m depressed. Oy vey! My brother’s wife was into belly-dancing, enjoyed it and it was great exercise for her too! NO way do I see myself doing that, I’d likely pull something LOL!
What kinda books do you like? That’d help us make some recommendations!
Sounds like you’re doing great. I should come here more often, I used to but got busy with work and school. I really enjoy reading it so I promise to come back often 🙂
Jess
Hooray for 32 lbs!! That’s incredible! :o)
Good luck with the construction boy; you have had a crush for a long time! Hope it pans out in your favor!
xoxo
You and I need to go on a wine-tour/religious discussion weekend. 🙂
32 pounds? Maybe I need to make with the belly dancing…
Book recommendations, eh? I’ll throw a few out there because I’m all readerly and such:
Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden
Atonement by Ian McEwan
Boy’s Life by Robert McCammon
A Girl Named Zippy & She Got Up Off the Couch (and Other Heroic Acts From Mooreland, Indiana) by Haven Kimmel
Ava: A Biography by Ava Gardner
Uglies by Scott Westerfeld
My Lobotomy by Howard Dully
Look Me in the Eye by John Elder Robison
Any book by Augusten Burroughs
Also, have you read any of Laurie Notaro’s books? Kind of chick directed, but this gay boy cracks up every time he reads one.
And finally, if you’re open to graphic novels, I would whole heartedly suggest the “Y – The Last Man” series by Brian K. Vaughn and “The Sandman” series by Neil Gaiman (author of Stardust, American Gods, and Anazasi Boys). Both series are adult, moving, and flat out brilliant.
Whew! Little sorry you asked now aren’t ya?
(And hooray for moving to WordPress — I can once again comment!)