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Archive for the ‘Mr. Wood’ Category

Thank you all so much for your kind words and emails.  I haven’t really been in the mood to write back, but I wanted to let every one of you that wrote that I appreciate your words more than anything.

My aunt is hanging in.  She is peeing on her own again, so that’s pretty good news.  She has two tumors that are pressing against her kidneys, which is causing the severe pain and other problems.  She received radiation the other day in hopes that it will shrink the kidneys enough to bring her pain from 10 to 6.  I spoke with her the other night and you can hear the pain in her voice.  She sounds out of breath.  She knows she’s dying.  My heart broke when she told me that she didn’t thing she’d be at this point so soon.  She thought she had more time.  Fuck, what do you say to that?

There were two deaths in my family this week.  Well, not really my family but people close to my family so I call them family.  I found about the second death last night, which caused me to have another sleepless night.  I took a vacation day today in order to rest.  I feel like my brain was mush.  I tried to get myself moving this morning, but my body was like…no, go back to sleep.  I took 2 Tylenol PM’s at 5 AM, called in to work, and passed out until about 10.  I can’t remember the last time I was in bed at 10 in the morning.  I felt like I slept the day away.  Now, I’m just relaxing.  It’s a beautiful day and I’m on my porch with my kitties writing while listening to Pandora.

In other news, I think I’m going to give up Mr. Wood.  Maybe.  I don’t know.  I’ll still admire him from afar, but I don’t think he’s interested.  Yesterday was the first time I saw him since I said “bless you” and nothing.  I didn’t see him until I got to my stop and he was ahead of me.  He parks near me.  I walked by his car, a white cadillac, and it was a perfect opportunity to say hi since nobody was around, but when I looked over at him he turned his head.  He also lives close to me, because I pulled out of the parking lot behind him and he went the same way I go for most of the trip home.  I’m thinking he’s probably married or he has a girlfriend or doesn’t think I’m attractive or something like that.

And when I think about a man driving a white caddy, I think…pimp.  I’d still go out with him if he asked me though.  There’s something about him.

I’m getting more into running than ever.  It’s weird, but I feel by body coming back to me.  The athlete I once was.  Once upon a time, my body was a fucking machine.  I ran 6 days a week and lifted weights and did yoga.  It’s been many years since I’ve been able to run the way I’m doing it now.  I feel good.  I’m doing a whole bunch of races this summer, hopefully working up to full marathons.  My goal is to eventually qualify for the Boston marathon in the next couple years.  I know I can do it.  I just have to train hard and keep myself focused on that goal.

Oh, and someone asked me if my boobs shrunk with all of this weight loss and exercising.  The answer is no.  I’m still a DD.  The only thing that’s shrunk is the bra band.  I’ve been a DD since I was in high school and I reckon I’ll still be a DD when I’m 100 years old.

I’m off to chill out.  I have a new favorite chick flick movie, The Jane Austen Book Club.  I love it.  I’m going to watch it again.

Have a great weekend.

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One of my famous numbered lists because it’s old school Fresh Air Lover and because I’m back to my dumb-ass and ridiculous self.

  1. Let’s start with Monday. I finally spoke to Mr. Wood (aka Construction worker I’ve been all kinds of crushing on…he’s a carpenter). Don’t get too excited, he sneezed and I said bless you and then he said thanks and I smiled and then he smiled and then we stared at each other for about 20 minutes which is how long the train ride home is and…the end. I’m a smooth operator, don’t be jealous.
  2. I moved my desk at work and it’s very nice. Very very nice.
  3. I was wearing my favorite pair of pants on Tuesday. They are too big on me now. Everything is too big on me. So, I’m wearing them and I’m in the bathroom looking at the sagging ass of the pants when I notice that my waistband is sticking out. They have a thick waistband with those hook-type thingies instead of buttons. I looked down at this protruding waistband and I had a thought, which is usually bad. My thoughts are often retarded.  I thought it looked like I had a package. You know, package that boys usually (hopefully, you know what I mean) come with.  I shared this with one of my good friends to which she replied, “GET AWAY FROM ME YOU NUT.” Yeah, I’m sorry for that Dawn.
  4. I got so irritated by the OxiClean guy on Tuesday night. I just hate his grating, irritating, obnoxious, constipated sounding voice. I believe I raised a fist and yelled, “Shut up you stupid fucker” or something like that when I heard someone clear their throat. Real close to where I was standing. It was the new guy who lives downstairs. He scared the shit out of me. I didn’t hear him come up my steps because I was concentrating intently on telling off the commercial. I also forgot my door was open. It was weird explaining my sad personality and anger issues to someone I don’t know very well. He looked a little weirded out.
  5. Period talk, consider yourself warned. I woke up this morning to bad cramps and what looked like a crime scene on my sheets. I haven’t bled like that in a very long time. What was even more terrible is that I was really lightheaded all morning. I feel better now and my flow has backed off, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit concerned.
  6. I haven’t seen Mr. Wood since our big conversation on Monday…bless you…and I’m pissed because I’ve dressed up and put some effort into my appearance every day this week. I even had my knee-high leather boots and eyeshadow on today.
  7. I could eat a whole baguette right now. This is the stuff I crave during menses. Not chocolate, but bread. With bruschetta. Or guacamole. Or butter. Or plain. Or the Alfredo dipping sauce at the Olive Garden. Ohhhhh, now I really want some bread.

And lastly, I feel like we need some Tool up on this shit.

…I sure could use a vacation from this stupid shit, silly shit, stupid shit…Fuck L Ron Hubbard and Fuck all his clones. Fuck all those gun-toting Hip gangster wannabes. Learn to swim. Fuck retro anything. Fuck your tattoos. Fuck all you junkies and Fuck your short memory. Learn to swim. Fuck smiley glad-hands With hidden agendas. Fuck these dysfunctional, Insecure actresses. Learn to swim…

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